* It's not that I'm immature, it's just that you started it!!
* The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
* Funner… is more gooder than just fun.
* Always remember one of the remarkable things about life… it's never so bad that it can't get worse.
* It's not the pace of life I mind… it's the sudden stop at the end.
* Work fascinates me; I can watch it for hours.
* I don't see dead people, but I do see some people that wish I were dead.
* I once tried to be a disc jockey, but I kept falling off the turntable.
* I’m only responsible for what I said… not for what you think you heard.
* When I kill a spider, I don’t clean it up. I leave it there so the other spiders know not to mess with me!
* Busy day on tap tomorrow: trim toenails, napping, snacking, getting the mail, brush teeth. It's just too much sometimes.
* It should be painfully obvious that I drank deeply from the well of ignorance...
* I'm just here four the typos…
* I think it's safe to say I know the least about anything of anyone reading this post.
* Although I don’t know karate, I do know crazy and I’m not afraid to use it.