8:57 AM -
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In Case You Missed It... 5-24-2013
-Dr. John F. Demartini D.C. BSC #powerful
* Been scoping out eTrade for stock in Kleenex Tissue... this head cold is about to get the best of me.
* Glitter starts out as a great idea... until you realize its the herpes of crafting supplies and you can't get rid of it.
* Looks like someone broke in and stole JUST our TV remote. Now he drives by and randomly changes the channels. If I EVER catch him...
* If any of my Florida friends or relatives has the sole winning PowerBall ticket worth $590M... please know I've always loved you.
* Nothing puts me more on edge than being stuck in a quiet waiting room with someone that has a booger that whistles with every breath...
* Word is that BUCKWHEAT of Little Rascals famed has turned to ISLAM! He is now known as KAREEM of WHEAT...
* Trying to understand what goes in my mind is like trying to smell the letter 9.
* I remember how happy my Mom was when I told her I was finally gonna try living on my own... until she found all her stuff in the yard.
*If I were a Greek philosopher, my name would be Mediocrites.
* Dial... dial... dial
Riiing... riiimg...
9-1-1... what is your emergency?
Me: Do you think I'm pretty?
* A baby's laughter is one of the most beautiful things you will here. Unless its 3:00am. And you're home alone. And you don't have a baby...
* I got caught peeing in the swimming pool today... the lifeguard shouted so loud I almost fell in.
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